DATE: November
2008
TITLE: After All This Time
AUTHOR: losingntrnslatn (LosingInTranslation,
Jennifer)
DISCLAIMER: Don’t own anything associated with the show… I just like
playing with the characters in it from time to time. Dance Monkeys! Dance!
RATING: T for Teen
SPOILERS: Through US Aired Episodes of Season 9
PAIRINGS: GSR
WORD COUNT: 947 (Yes, a ficlet!)
PROMPT: John Stewart’s “All the Words Unspoken”
SUMMARY: Sara’s thoughts on her final departure from
A/N: I owed one of my fellow 1hour2write mods a songfic, and while it took
me a little while to pull it off, I think it turned out pretty good. What do
you think?
REVIEWS: Reviews are the way I know if people are enjoying the work or
not. So, if you leave one, THANKS! And if not, I hope you found at least a
little something to brighten your day, and thanks for taking the time to read.
After All This Time
After all
this time, and it finally came down to nothing more than packing up her
overnight bag and silently walking away. Nothing was said, not outright. There
was no fight left in either of them. It was as it had always been, with all the
words unspoken.
There were
no careful discussions about what they would do with the furniture. Not a
single word about what would become of the dog. And nothing at all about the
sadness that came with their breakup.
It was
always that way, the words, so important in every other aspect of his life,
were just as absent in their failure as they had been during their
relationship. And Sara was left to wonder if maybe she had been filling in the
blanks incorrectly all along.
As she
looked around the bedroom they once shared, she wanted to cry, but her tears
had all been spent. It seemed like such a huge defeat, but it came with an
eerie silence, devoid of any words.
Walking away
that day, she was overcome by the volume of the things he didn’t say. How could
silence roar so loudly in her ears? He never answered her question with words,
but his quiet acceptance spoke to her with a thunderous clap.
She wanted
to hate him for his inability to communicate when it came to them. She wanted
him to suffer when she left, and she wanted to punish him for never telling her
what she needed so desperately to hear. But even as she rocked to sleep on the
waves every night, she could never bring herself to hate him.
In the end,
she did what she had always done, and she gave him leave. She let him go,
because she thought it would assuage his guilt and allow him to move on.
When she
sent him that video, it took everything in her power not to crack and tell him
all of the words that had been waiting inside her throat for years; all the
words she hoped and prayed were waiting inside his throat, too. But she knew
that wasn’t fair, and so instead she left the walls standing and told him he
was free.
That was
when she cried.
Tears of
pain and tears of shame poured from her eyes and Sara felt all of it surround
her in darkness and despair. Everything they endured had been for naught, and
nothing of the love she once thought they shared remained.
Her chest
heaving from the sobs, she was suddenly shaken by a warm heavy hand.
“Sara? Wake
up.” With a gasp, she opened her eyes and tried to focus on her surroundings.
Clutching a hand to her chest, she turned toward the very concerned voice. “Are
you okay?”
The worry
lines around his eyes were firmly creased, but she could see so much more
behind the wrinkles and she smiled. “Sorry, just a bad dream, I guess.”
He wiped
the tears from her eyes and gently kissed her forehead. “Okay… Do you want to
talk about it?”
Sara smiled
to herself as she thought about the horrible dream. “It’s silly.”
He slipped
into the bed and brought her up to rest on his chest. “But if it upset you,
maybe you should talk it out.”
Patting his
chest, she snuggled in a little and smiled again. “Are you sure?”
He chuckled
and she could feel it rumble beneath her ear. “I wouldn’t have asked
otherwise.”
“Okay.” She
sat up in bed beside him and began to tell him about the horrible events in her
dream in vivid detail. He listened intently, his hands laced behind his head as
she explained it all.
When she
reached the end of her tale, he sighed as he dropped his hands and took hold of
one of hers. “Well, then I guess it’s a good thing you don’t know anyone who’s as
much an ass as that guy, huh?”
She looked
down between them and watched as he played with the ring on her finger. When
she looked up, she saw the sheepish expression on his face and took pity on
him. Sara leaned over and picked up his chin so that she could look him in the
eyes. “Not anymore.”
The blush
on his cheeks contrasted nicely with the verdant blue of his eyes and Sara was
unable to resist him. She leaned in further and pressed her lips to Gil’s as
his arms reached up to wrap around her.
There was
no other feeling quite like having his body surrounding hers. And she was
reminded of that fact with crystal clarity as Gil turned her over in the bed
and covered her body with his. With all
the words he whispered softly against her skin, Sara felt freedom from the
doubt which once filled her days.
Just as
things were heating up, an insistent cry called out from the next room. Gil
growled and buried his head in Sara’s neck. “Can’t she wait ten minutes?”
Sara
laughed at his exasperation. “Sorry, but while she doesn’t have the words yet,
she definitely gets the message out loud and clear.” She gave him a gentle
shove and Gil rolled onto his back as the baby cried out again. “Now, go get
her before she really starts to give you what for.”
Playing the
reluctant father, he moved the edge of the bed and protested as he rose. “The
things I do for love.”
Sara
teasingly swatted his backside as he walked away from the bed. The leering
glance he shot back at her told Sara they would be revisiting the topic after
the morning feedings.